Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Tonight's flavor in the ER has been stupidity--even more than usual. Or maybe I'm just grumpier than usual... You tell me.
1. One of the nurses who is about 5'5" tall and probably weighs at least 260 pounds (I'm a really bad guess), of which at least 100 pounds of it is in her ass,was wearing $200 MBT shoes today. For some reason, some of the nurses here have decided that's what they need to help get their legs and back and butts in shape. They call them their "Make Butt Tight" shoes. Now even if those shoes make her butt tight, how in the hell is anybody going to see it for the 100 pounds of tabletop rear overlying it?!
2. 27-year-old white female came in complaining of fibromyalgia, lupus, Sjogren's syndrome, back aches, head aches, numbness in her fingers, memory loss, spells of cold sweaty hands coupled with a hot body, dizziness, nausea, cough, abdomenal pain from her left ovary, left ear pain, difficulty breathing, and panic attacks. Now this was all her complaints for tonight, what she wanted us to deal with tonight. Then she tells me, (read whiney tone here)"but I can't find a doctor who doesn't think I'm a hypochondriac." She wasn't having so much trouble breathing that she couldn't suck down a friggin' cigarette before she walked in!
3. 56-year-old white female with headache for 36 hours came in with a headache that's the worst one she's ever had, but it wasn't so bad she bothered to take any Tylenol, Motrin, BC powders, Alleve or any other over-the-counter medicine before she came. She just pranced on over to her friendly, neighborhood ER.
4. 28-year-old white male and female couple who together tip the scale at over 500 pounds decided that tonight was the night they just had to deal with this cough that they had had for the last month. It seems their usual provider, a nurse practitioner, has an office that is too "inconvenient" to get to. The good news is that they've cut down since they've been sick and are now only smoking 1/2 a pack a person a day. Unfortunately, I was unable to give him a work excuse for the three days last week that he took off from work but didn't bother to see his usual provider. They got a little miffed when I asked them, "Do you have any medical problems other than your weight?" Apparently, they don't see their weight as a problem...or their smoking...or their complete stupidity.
5. 32-year-old 5'1" 260# African American female came in at 0230 for left back pain, that she thought was "just a pulled muscle" which was going on for the last 3 days. It was just so bad tonight that she couldn't rest, so she decided to come to the ER. Apparently lifting her arms to take some pills and a drink of water exacerbated it too because she didn't bother doing that before she racked up several hundred dollars in ER bill.
I also had a 84-year-old white gentleman who is originally from Key West, and about whom I could almost bet money Jimmy Buffett wrote "I Wish I Had A Pencil-thin Mustache." His black, pencil-thin mustache was perfectly trimmed and colored black. That was just fun.
These are just the ones I thought to write down so I could remember and share. I'm sure there are more. And, honestly, interspersed amongst the insanity were some great people. The good news is unless I make a major league screw up, I guess I won't ever have to worry about being out of a job.
I've been nursing the crud--a cough, sore throat, aches, etc. That and the medicine I'm taking for it has contributed to my oversleeping today and yesterday. Yesterday I felt bad enough that I decided the rest would do me better than the workout, and I believe it did. I did grease-the-groove with a bunch of assisted pistols at work, though. Today, I dragged my butt out of bed eventually and did all of the workout that I could. I'll do the rest in the morning before I go to sleep.
4 rounds of 4 of each:
Double 16kg C&P
Double 16kg Squat (these were just brutally hard today)
Double 16kg KB Burpees
Double 16kg Renegade Rows
Rest about 1.5 min--this is usually 1 min, but today it had to be longer. I'm trying to learn to listen to my body.
Then...4 rounds of 15 Double 16kg Swings with 30 sec rest b/w rounds.
When I get home, I'll do the Essentials test twice with the 12kg with a min or two of rest b/w rounds.
As a side note, my dad is scheduled for a heart cath today which scares me a little and makes me very sad. He's supposed to be Superman--even if he is 72. :)