Thursday, October 9, 2008

As I was gathering my things this morning to head out for St. Paul, I
grabbed my list I made at work the day before yesterday to make sure
I wasn't forgetting anything. When I left work yesterday morning, I
grabbed my things in a hurry, paying no attention to this list I'd set
aside hours before. This morning,though, I noticed the other
handwriting & the note my friend Jamie had left behind.

I spend an inordinate amount of my life feeling guilty for first one
thing, then another--mostly feeling that I fail to be the wife,
daughter, sister and friend that I should be. It is my eternal catch
22. Time for one thing takes time away from another thus preventing me
from feeling too good about the time spent. As much as I am looking
forward to this trip, I'm sitting here at the airport feeling like a
schmuck for leaving the hubbie by himself for 5 days or not taking the
five days to be with my sister & mom who are spending the week
together. It really never ends.

Every now & then, though, I think maybe I don't suck so bad & feel a
little less guilty. See why I'm always talking about being the
luckiest girl in the world? A husband I hate to leave & friends like


  1. It's good to go places without your significant other. Sure you'll miss him, but it's you time away from the daily stress everyone gets acclimated too. He'll probably enjoy the down time too.

    Besides you're going to be kicking butt and impressing people, and it'll be over before you know it.

    As for friends, if I could, I'd be there with you, holding up a sign saying GO JEN! (I'm not ready for the real work yet, but could use a vacation myself).

  2. I so get what you're talking about and you really can drive yourself crazy with the questioning of choices. There will ALWAYS be more that we COULD be doing. But to dwell on what we're not doing, we miss the actual experience we're having, you know? So fully commit to your choice (just like you've gotta fully commit to the snatch, cuz half measures will get you HURT!). Make this time count! Enjoy every single minute!